The Time I Got Mugged by Robot Elvis

Well, I did it good this time. I knew I shouldn't have posted that thing about Robot Elvis, and somehow I jinxed myself. I was walking down the street and I felt a metal fist hit me in the back of the head. As Robot Elvis rained blows upon me, I began to loose consciousness. He stole my keys, my wallet, my hat, and my chapstick. I don't know what Robot Elvis needs with chapstick, but I didn't design him. I think he's malfunctioned in some way causing him to misbehave even worse than the original Elvis. I spent most of the week in the hospital, which is why I didn't post any new true stories.