Wednesday, July 26, 2006

Secret Zip Codes

Everyone knows their own zip code, but what they don't know is what that zip code is telling the government. Each geographic area has a zip code, and encoded in that is data on the economic, social, racial, and religious makeup of the zip code. During a national disaster like a hurricane, you could be denied evacuation or aide based solely on your zip code. The government uses this data to make snap decisions about who to save when they can't save everyone. In your disaster preparedness kit, you should write down the zip code of the wealthiest, best educated neighborhood in your city, especially if it has Chinese people living there. Then, if an official asks for your zip code, give him the fake one. Some of the most important people like government officials, business leaders, and college professors have their own private zip codes. If you have the home address of your professor or CEO, give the government his zip code and they might even fly you out of there first class.

6 Comments:

Blogger LeoBro said...

A mailman told me that in case of a national emergency, FEMA can turn on force fields at the ZIP code boundary lines so no one can cross.

6:35 PM  
Blogger Lew said...

Also, water systems are piped according to zip code so if need be the government can target the water supply of certain deomographics. Examples include poision, drugs that sterilize men or women, hallucinogens, tranquilizers, and methadone if they want to detox an entire ghetto.

7:25 PM  
Blogger LeoBro said...

Yeah, he also told me ZIP stands for "Zero Independence Perimeters." And you don't even want to know what your Social Security number stands for.

9:24 PM  
Blogger Lew said...

Everyone knows Social security numbers contain information like where you were born, etc. What they don't know is that they contain enough personal information to even figure out the color of your eyes and hair and newer ones produced in the last few years are starting to use a compression algorithm to use your SSN as a checksum against your DNA, in essence, they can take your DNA and verify that your social security number really belongs to you, but your DNA can't give away your SSN. It's a very interesting program they have.

10:04 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Don't forget the birds in LEO loaded with orbital ordinance. Just dial in the zip code, and urban pacification ensues.

9:16 PM  
Blogger Cameron Ansari said...

This comment has been removed by the author.

11:22 AM  

Post a Comment

<< Home